Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Five Reasons Why Today is Just Weird
Posted by Sam at 2:02 PM | tags: , ,

1) The pants that I wear everyday just feel wrong today.

2) The coffee isn't working. Did someone mislabel the coffee dispensers? If I'm drinking decaf, I'm gonna be mightily peeved.

3) I just came from a meeting concerning a new project that I am purportedly "perfect for." I don't really know all of the details yet, but the project is essentially a memorial film/slideshow showcasing the life and times of a recently deceased horse. It's moments like these where I find myself severely questioning the direction of my career.

4) I forgot my watch.

5) I guess that I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed today... which is hard because there's a wall there.

Comments: 2 | Post a Comment | Permalink


That sounds like an...interesting...day. Usually I find that when my pants don't fit, it's cuz they are someone elses.

Your horse slide show sounds interesting. I think you should gussy it up by showing what happens after the horse passes away.

"Please change the slide at the beep"


"Here's Sidesaddle. Once a magnificent race pony. Now a husk of lifeless meat. But, oh, what meat!"


"You see, after Sidesaddle broke her leg, her owner carefully and respectfully unloaded his .50 Caliber Desert Eagle into her skull, ensuring a quick and painless passing."


"After this ritual, Sidesaddle is picked up by the truck from Sunny Farms, where her body will be properly disposed of."


"At Sunny Farms, Sidesaddle is unloaded into a 'hopper' where her body is moved in for processing"


"After a little post-mortem 'processing', Sidesaddle is placed inside her semi-final resting containers, where her meat can stay fresh and juicy for aeons."


"Sunny Farms Canned Meat. When the best is good enough!"


"This has been an 'eat meat' production.

Comment By Blackwatch on February 07, 2006 4:15 PM


I was going to add a funny comment about dead horses and Sam's suitability for a mixed media presentation about them but after the first comment why bother. Its been done.

Comment By TheDarkLordDerfla on February 07, 2006 5:04 PM

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Sam is an amazing and humble guy. Once, he rushed into a burning building, up six flights of stairs to save a kitten from certain death. He speaks eight languages, has mastered three varieties of martial arts, is a wine expert, and is a pulitzer prize winning author. Sam is an international heart-throb who prefers a quiet evening at home knitting afghans for the homeless, to the go-go, glitz and glamor of the party scene. I think the day he won the silver medal for ballroom dancing at the 98 olympics was the happiest of his life. Pretty impressive for a guy who never finished the 8th grade. - Carrie, 04
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