Friday, May 12, 2006

I Like Dead Things
Posted by Sam at 5:20 PM | tags: ,

Well, the semester is over. It was grueling. But it's done. And now there's finally time to concentrate on some other, more important, passions. Like my fondness for all things dead. Yep, I like dead things. I like 'em so much that I think I'll start a new blog about 'em. Let's call it ILIKEDEADTHINGS.com, and let's read a bit from the intro:

It's true. I like dead things. In fact, the deader the better. And why? Well, it's really quite simple: I'm a disturbed young man.

In actuality, however, I'm very well-adjusted. I am. Really. Just ask my Mom (she'll also tell you that I'm handsome and quite a catch.
Hi Mom!). It's just... well, I've always had an obsession - no, let's call it a fascination - with elements of a darker nature, yet I've never been one to take this fascination too seriously. My unyielding love of zombie movies, for example, is a prime illustration of this characteristic. The zombie movie, while exhilarating in every sense of the word, is just a movie. I heart zombies. I really do. But I also know that they're not real. And you know what else? They're kind of cute too... in that helpless kitten sort of way. All they want are some brains or flesh to feed on. Is that too much to ask? Wobbling around and moaning... they're just hungry. Anyway, my point is that zombies, while decaying desecrations of death, are pretty darn delightful. Wait. Is that my point? No, I think my point is that as I maintain this blog, I will strive to keep one foot firmly planted in reality and will always attempt to have my tongue firmly positioned in my cheek. And so, despite my love of all things zombie, I know that, realistically, there is no legitimate reason to worry about a zombie outbreak (in my lifetime, anyway. My housemate has always said, "When it comes to zombie infestation, it's not a matter of IF, but more a matter of WHEN." Ahh... bless her paranoid little soul).

Fine fine fine... So you like dead things. I get it. But, what does your unhealthy obsession... er, fascination have to do with this blog? I mean, what the heck is this thing about, anyway? Well, I'm glad you asked. I LIKE DEAD THINGS is about all things dark, disturbing, and... well, dead. Posts will range in topic, but every entry will be united under one universal theme: creepiness. Yep. No blogging about the Care Bears on this site... unless they're mutant bizaaro Care Bears that come alive during the night to collect human eyeballs. Yeah, that'd definitely be blog-worthy. But, it's important to note that, much like my fascination with elements of a darker nature, I LIKE DEAD THINGS will never take itself too seriously. It is my intention to find the humor amidst the creepiness, and blog about it without remorse.

Let's recap, shall we?

1. I like dead things. It's true. I do.

2. I'm very well adjusted. Just ask my Mom.

3. Zombies are delightfully cute.

4. This blog is about all things dark, disturbing, and dead.

5. Despite the morose theme, this blog will endeavor to find humor amidst the death... and it is there. It may be at the bottom of a pool of blood, but it is there. And I'll find it. I'll wade through blood until I stub my toe against it. And then, of course, I'll blog about it.

And there you have it. Enjoy... if you can.


So, please take a gander at my newest blogging endeavor:

I LIKE DEAD THINGS

It's sure to make you pleasantly nauseous.

Comments: 1 | Post a Comment | Permalink

hmmm...i can see from the lack of comments to this post at this point in time that nobody shares your taste for the post-mortem.

Comment By bryan on May 13, 2006 6:46 PM

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Sam Who!?
Sam is an amazing and humble guy. Once, he rushed into a burning building, up six flights of stairs to save a kitten from certain death. He speaks eight languages, has mastered three varieties of martial arts, is a wine expert, and is a pulitzer prize winning author. Sam is an international heart-throb who prefers a quiet evening at home knitting afghans for the homeless, to the go-go, glitz and glamor of the party scene. I think the day he won the silver medal for ballroom dancing at the 98 olympics was the happiest of his life. Pretty impressive for a guy who never finished the 8th grade. - Carrie, 04
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